now is the return to the city, post hotsprings. time there was timeless, no real clocks or schedules, just a gong to call us to the veggie meals. i was in my usual place of fear and frustration, then on day three i just gave up and let it flow over me(literally, the day was a rain event like only the northwest can produce.).then i left on monday and got stuck in the ice and snow on a mountain road which i took because i turned the wrong way. i had to dig my lovely van out with a handy douglasfir branch i found on the roadside. and what i learned is that i can, if i just sit for a minute and don't lose my mind because of fear or anger at myself. portlandia is all that i expected, including crowded, busy,full of waytoohip folks, and yet soemhow compelling. maybe they nees a dose of barbitchka here?